Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub.

These are the sounds a heart makes when beating at the average rate. But there is one heart that exists that makes quite a different sound. It doesn’t beat the average way and when motivated by taunts it beats faster and faster with rage- just like a wolf.

Behind this wolf comes other wolves. A pack all together forming the perfect pyramid figure as it dashes through the forest claiming its territory. With barks and howls, each signals each other different commands that makes their wolf pack stronger and stronger. The more they run the more blood thirsty they become and the more blood thirsty they become the more this pack of hearts beat. All that blood being pushed through the veins of these angry beasts- just imagine. All together they drool over the deer they hunt that now detects them, becomes alarmed, and with an instinctual beat of the heart, it runs off away from the wolves. There is no shelter for the poor deserted deer. There is no salvation beyond the after world it is about to encounter. The only thing it knows is the panic alarm going off in its heart. Then, suddenly, blindsided by its own beating fear, the head of the wolf pack takes a great leap landing its claws perfectly onto its torso and neck. It sinks its teeth deeply into the throat. Blood rushes through the body in places where blood wasn’t meant to be. The internal bleeding begins. The other wolf right behind the head of the pack joins in to confirm the kill. This one bights into the deer’s chest breaking through bones leaving the heart open for the kill. Another mouth penetrates the delicate skin of the deer and soon enough the rest come in to help. All the blood seeps through various locations to the point where the deer is drained between the tugging and pulling of teeth leading the deer to suffocate on its own blood-filled lungs.

Ug… Glub… Ug… Glub… Ug…

Drained and dead, this victory calls for a communal howl that echoes throughout the forest. One after the other they thank the night for the chance to end another life and feed another cub. Another night for life amongst these dog-like hunters. Their hearts beat strong as their instincts remain in tact. Another night to celebrate their aggressive lifestyle.

Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. A crooked old man feels that same aggression in his heart. Torn by failed promise he stands by the MUNI stop in San Francisco angry at the world. Of course, he is not always angry, but sadly it is true that all he sees around him is an ora of chaos he calls a temporary home. There is no love in this world. There is no light. All he sees is a land of failed opportunity due to his blind cynicism fueled by loss. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. What makes this heart beat so strong and defiant? A song sounds through the tile caves of this particular MUNI stop. Nothing stops it. It just repeats and repeats. The old crooked man stairs blankly at the ground reminiscing in a world so thick and distant. What he remembers? All of it. What he feels? A hint of it. The more the song plays, though, the more he feels it. Ug glub. Ug glub. Just like the pack of wolves. Except for the wolves it was instinct to feel that way. For the old crooked man it feels like the entire pack’s power of hearts resides in this one internal organ.

But he can’t make it stop. He doesn’t want it to stop. This beating gives the world a new sense of color. Ug glub ug glub. He is no longer so old. He is young and straightened and can walk just fine. The wrinkles are gone and his sense of humor is back. He’s no longer at the MUNI. He’s now at the high school prom. There they are right in the middle of it all. They hold loving hands and stand close to each other with their loving young bodies. And there that song plays as it repeats and repeats. They spin and spin and it plays and plays. Their hearts are racing as love has filled the air. This feeling goes beyond peace. It resides at beautiful chaos. And suddenly the young straightened man meets eyes with his partner’s and suddenly they both become lost within each other’s eyes. They become so lost that they feel the beating heart of the panicked dear who was blinded by fear before it was gutted. There they were so vulnerable and alive. It pays to suspect the worst at your best.

Then it was there, the MUNI train blasted through the tunnel, interrupting and dispersing all memories of such good times. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub… Ug glub. The crooked old man’s heart began to calm down. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. Ug glub. Suddenly he found himself back to reality. The train doors opened and he approached the car when suddenly he realized that that song had stopped. The only thing left to repeat itself in this cruel cold world was the sound of his heat, “Ug glub. Ug glub.”

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